Bad JuJu

     Recently, I traveled to Hawaii for a little rest and relaxation in Lanai. While in Lanai, we would walk the exquisite beaches each day and see the springer dolphins. The sand was pristine and it was most unusual because there wasn't one shell to be found. I would watch crabs run into their holes and wonder why no shells were washed onto the beach. On all of my travels, I either collect rocks or shells and place them in small boxes around my home. So, needless to say, I was disappointed to come up short in Hawaii. As I was walking, it occurred to me that I could collect the beautiful lava rocks that bordered the ocean.  I began to pick up red, black, and brown rocks and I was happy in the knowledge that I would have some beautiful reminders from this trip to bring home.
      On the last evening of our stay in Lanai, we were having a great dinner at Nobu. We got into a discussion with our waitress about the lack of any shells on the beaches. She informed us that on some beaches, there were shells and on others, there were none. I then proceeded to tell her that I had collected lava rock in lieu of the shells. Her smile instantly turned to a grimace and she told me that I must NEVER displace the lava rock from the beach. I would get "BAD JUJU"! What the hell is bad juju? Someone who doesn't observe the Jewish Holidays? Or a bad piece of candy?
     JuJu is a term that originally travelled to America from West Africa.  You can receive good juju
by saving a kitten or returning someone's lost wallet.  In other  words, if you perform any good deed, you can have good juju. Apparently, what I did by taking the rocks and displacing the natural habitat was very bad. I, or my family and friends would forever be haunted by a bad vibe or aura. Terrible things would come my way if I didn't return those rocks. Oy vay, I started to shake. A panic attack ensued. More vodka was needed. Everyone knows you don't walk under ladders; you never open an umbrella inside the house; you can't put a hat on the bed; if you enter at the front door, you must exit by the same door, and heaven forbid a black cat crosses my path, I will take an alternative route an hour out of my way just to change my direction. You get the point-I am very superstitious.
      The waitress suggested that we return the rocks to the exact spot we removed them from and all would be right with the world again. Don't you know I was on that beach the next morning with those  rocks in hand? I walked back to the place where they had been and quickly replaced them. NO MORE BAD JUJU for me!!!
      However, once I returned home, something happened. I was walking in my daughter's apartment without my shoes and stubbed my toe. I didn't just stub it-upon closer inspection, it was hanging off my foot. So, today, I went to see the foot Dr. and guess what? I fractured the toe. Now for 4 weeks I must tape it and wear a crazy shoe to keep it stable. Was this bad juju or just a mere coincidence? I don't know which it was. I am not taking any chances. Tomorrow I will go out and feed a homeless person, donate clothes to the salvation army, and give some money to a needy charity. I have to get some good juju ASAP so I can reverse the spell.