Tuesday, October 6, 2020
Mr. Trump, where is your "rachmanus"?
The Yiddish word rachmanus is loosely defined to mean compassion,empathy,mercy and pity. Rachmanus rules have played a major role in the JCC Maccabi Games. Some of the rules cited for these games are: Treat others as you would like to be treated. Be a good loser and a gracious winner. Make a positive difference. Refrain from actions that many cause injury to others. Lead by example.
In the past four years, Trump has showed no inkling of rachmanus. To ANYONE. EVER. But, when he got the virus, I thought to myself-NOW. NOW, he will finally understand the tragedy of 210,000 deaths in our country. NOW, he can relate to the 7.5 million cases in the U.S and what a horrendous virus Covid is. NOW he will understand the need for more testing, the need for more ppe, and the need for more contact tracing. AND, Finally, he will comprehend the need for social distaning, for isolating for 14 days when you exhibit symptoms or test positive, he will understand the importance of wearing a mask, and he will tell the people of the U.S. that it is imperative to be diligent at all times when leaving their home. It would become crystal clear to him that he was totally wrong about this being exactly "like the flu". In the past four years the sum of deaths from the flu did not total over 200,000! And, we have a vaccine for the flu. He would have an epiphany now that, he too, is now sick with Corona. He would pontificate that we DO need to listen to the scientists. He would realize his life, his wife's life, and our lives depend on it.
BUT NOOOOOOOOOO-this man cares about noone. Instead, he gathered up his secret service (while being treated with 3 drugs in the hospital and while he was extremely contagious) to chaffeur a joyride in order to wave to his supporters. That was not showing rachmanus. How does he not protect the lives of the people who have dedicated their lives to protecting him and his family?
Did you know he came late to the debate last Tuesday and therefore, did not get tested at the Cleveland Clinic? He was probably contagious at that point. Is that showing rachmanus to the Biden's, Chris Wallace, the audience? Did you know that Trump's family also went maskless at the debate despite the state health guidelines mandating masks? How is that showing empathy and compassion? Rather, it shows a total lack of kindness and respect for others.
Noone seems to be discussing the Trump fund raiser in Bedminster,N.J. The President's decision to attend that event despite his known exposure after Hope Hicks tested positive for Covid was appalling and horrifying. He literally put the entire staff and 200 supporters in danger. The club should be shut down for 14 days. Children of these supporters are being asked to remain home and not attend school.Don't even get me started on the Rose Garden debacle for Judge Barret. At the minimum, 11 people now have Covid from that event.
Which brings me to the question: when was Trump's last negative test? How long has he been contagious? His behavior has been reckless. He has callous disregard for human lives.
When he returned to the White House last night and removed his mask, I thought I would just pass out. Is he delirious? He
is supposed to be isolating for 14 days. Instead, he had someone get close enough to him to apply makeup and then he summoned photographers so that he could have a photo op. I was literally watching an Orange Evita. Don't cry for me! Cry for him.
Trump had the opportunity to turn this around, to be a positive leader, to show compassion and empathy for what this country is experiencing. He refuses to allow the CDC to perform contact tracing for the Rose Garden Event. Why? He is now blocking the FDA from testing the vaccine for two months to ensure it is safe. Why? Because he doesn't care about human life. He solely cares about being reelected.
Evidently, his Jewish son in law, Jared, hasn't informed him of the meaning of rachmanus. Maybe Stephen Miller will enlighten Trump!
But,it's doubtful.
PEACE OUT! ONE B
HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY WILL!
Friday, September 18, 2020
Thursday, September 10, 2020
SOCIALLY DISTANCING ON THE SOFAS
Summer 2020 is coming to an end and I am not sad. I always look forward to the crisp fall air, the changing color of the leaves, pumpkins, Halloween, and Thanksgiving. This summer was an odd time for all of us. I am so grateful for my ability to spend an abundance of beautiful days and evenings at our country club. For me, being able to remain socially distant while enjoying delicious meals and magnificent views to boot was key. It helped create a feeling that everything was "normal".
On occasion, I have been chastised for refusing to sit at a table with others where I cannot maintain a social distance of six feet. If this is something you choose to do and you are fine with joining others at a table or dining out at a restaurant, I totally support you. I don't judge your preferences. I don't have any expectations of others and I want you to be happy. But I too, do not want to be judged for my choices or what makes me feel comfortable. Betraying myself to make others feel better is too stressful for me, and not something I will do.
So that being said, school is back in session. People are returning to work and their offices. We are going more places and coming into contact with more people. Please continue to stay safe, mask, and wash hands often. As we all know, children are often asymptomatic and carrying the virus. I have once again started masking inside my grandchildren's home. By masking, I am trying to keep others and myself well. It's a courtesy and a respect that all of us must continue to do.
As the cold weather approaches, I assume we will have lots more time to read and watch television. Before you are glued to the television set solely watching the election results and becoming totally depressed, I have many suggestions to keep you occupied and distracted from politics.
BOOKS
Sex and Vanity-Kevin Kwan's new book. The author of Crazy Rich Asians. A light, easy read filled with comic footnotes that tells the story of a woman torn between two men from completely opposite cultures.
Writers and Lovers-Lily King. A very well written novel about a 31 yeare old woman trying to fulfill her dream of becoming a writer. Excellent-Loved it.
Friends and Strangers-J.Courtney Sullivan. Yet another novel about a writer who is also a mom and wife with secrets(that I haven't read about yet).
The Gifts of Imperfection-Brene' Brown. This book has been around a long time. Basically, the key idea is to live a life that is authentic and true-don't try to conform for others. Have self confidence to embrace your uniqueness and not feel judged. Very relevant to today even though it was penned in 2018.
Memoirs and Misinformation-Jim Carrey. I'm listening to this on audible. This is semi-autobiographical about a successful actor's lonliness, and need for constant afirmation. Kooky and interesting...not sure!
Unlocking Us-Brene' Brown. This is a Podcast about vulnerability and courage. Many helpful words to help us balance the hard "stuff" with humor and hope.
And for those of us who haven't gotten enough of President Trump and his family, there are some juicy tell alls with much of the information we've already heard infinite times during his presidency.
Too Much Is Never Enough-Mary Trump. Trump's niece reveals the dysfunctional background of the Trump family.
Disloyal:A Memoir-Michael Cohen. Again, nothing that we don't know. Granted, Cohen, Trump's lawyer was as crooked as Trump. But, he documents that they spent a lot of time paying off people to hide affairs, tax evasion, and to vanquish rivals.
Melania and Me-Stephanie Winston Wolcott. I find her to be a very credible source and an interesting read. As a close friend of Melania's, and an accomplished woman, she was hired to produce the Inauguration. My take away from this book-Melania, is in fact, happy to be in the White House and is totally complicit with Donald's words and actions.
MOVIES
I AM WOMAN-9/11 release on Amazon Prime. The story of Helen Reddy.
COASTAL ELITES-9/12 release on HBO. Comedy about the pandemic starring Sarah Paulson and Bette Midler.
ANTEBELLUM-9/18 release on demand. Janelle Monae stars in a movie about systemic racism. Horror movie-sort of psychological thriller. Same producers as Get Out and Us.
MISBEHAVIOUR-9/25 release in theaters only. About a team of woman trying to disrupt the 1970 Miss World Competition. Starring Keira Knightley and Greg Kinnear.
BOYS IN THE BAND-9/30 release on Netflix. A remake of the original film produced by Ryan Murphy. Starring Jim Parsons and Andrew Rannells.
ON THE ROCKS-10/23 release on Apple TV Plus. Written and Directed by Sofia Coppola. A young mom reconnects with her playboy father in New York. Starring Rashida Jones and Bill Murray.
OVER THE MOON-10/23 release on Netflix. FOR KIDS! Animated musical about an adventurous girl who builds a rocket to meet a mythical goddess on the moon.
SOUL-11/20 released in theaters. FOR KIDS! Animated adventure about a middle school music teacher who dreams of becoming a jazz performer. Starring Jamie Foxx.
WONDER WOMAN 1984-November release in theaters. FOR KIDS! Wonder woman battles Maxwell Lord and the Cheetah.
LET EM' GO-11/06 release in theaters and then Netflix. Retired Sheriff and his wife try to rescue their grandson from a dangerous family. Kevin Costner(My favorite) and Diane Lane.
SERIES
AWAY-Streaming now on Netflix. Fabulous story about astronauts taking a 3 year trip to Mars, with back stories on their families. Hillary Swank stars.
RACHED-9/18 release on Netflix. The back story of Nurse Rached from One flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. Produced by Ryan Murphy, this 8 episode series stars Sarah Paulson and Sharon Stone.
EMILY IN PARIS-10/02 release on Netflix. Created by Daren Star. Emily moves to Paris and experiences culture clashes. Lily Collins stars. If you are a fan of Sex and The City, you'll like this.
THE UNDOING-10/25 HBO. Psychological thriller starring Nicole Kidman and Hugh Grant. Looks great!
COBRA KAI-streaming now on Netflix. FOR KIDS and adults too! Ralph Macchio, the karate kid stars. Three seasons. Everyone is loving this!
THE RIGHT STUFF-10/09 on Disney+. Drama based oin Tom Wolfe's 1979 novel about astronauts.
THE DUTCHESS=9/11 release on Netflix. A semi-autobiographical comedy on comedian Katherine Ryan's life in London. Looks great!
THE CROWN-11/05. Season four begins! The life of Queen Elizabeth II from 1940 to the present. Olivia Colman and Helena Bonham Carter. Can't wait!
THE GREAT HACK-Now on Netflix. Facebook Cambridge Analytica Scandal. Private companies harvest information on us. The dark side of social media. Very scary and interesting.
THE WHITE QUEEN-Now on Starz. Historical Drama. Blood Feud between the House of York and the House of Lancaster. Takes place in 1464.
I hope I have provided you with enough entertainment until we have a vaccine for the virus. In these times, it is so important to acknowledge the strange sadness we are all sharing; but to also have the ability to move far away from it for
periods of time. Hopefully, these suggestions will aide you in this journey!
Until we see each other again-PEACE OUT-ONE B
Sunday, July 19, 2020
Watch, Binge, Repeat
🚸With all this time on my hands, I have been watching even more tv than my usual amount. Lately, I prefer movies or shorter series because my attention span isn't great these days.
First I'll suggest some good shows for the KIDS:
Hamilton-on Disney Plus. My grandsons give it 2 thumbs up and will sing you the entire score!
The Baby Sitter's Club-on Netflix. I just watched the series so I could discuss it with my grandchildren, and thought it was terrific. Many lessons are taught and it's fun to watch.
The Secret Garden(2020)-on Netflix. Haven't watched. A child's parents suddenly dies and she moves to her Aunt and Uncle's home where a magical garden exists.
Recently watched MOVIES:
Da Five Bloods-on Netflix. Amazing performance by Delroy Lindo. About Vietnam and a heist.
The King of Staten Island-on Prime. Autobiography of Pete Davidson from Saturday Night Live. Comedy/drama. I liked this but recommend it for the 50 and under crowd and/or fans of SNL.
The Truth-on Netflix. Starring Catherine Deneuve, Juliette Binoche and Ethan Hawke. Mother daughter drama. Great cast. Deneuve is fabulous to watch.
Shirley-on Hulu. Elisabeth Moss stars as famed horror author Shirley Jackson. Moss is superb, but the movie is fair yet held my interest.
Hope Gap-on Amazon Prime. Intense story of Grace (Annette Bening) and her husband (Bill Nighy).
About a disintegrating marriage of 29 years. Excellent performances. Worth a watch.
Saving Face-on Amazon Prime. A story of a lesbian doctor navigating her love relationship and balancing her traditional mother and grandparent's views with her lifestyle. Thumbs up.
DOCUMENTARIES or SHOWS BASED ON A TRUE STORY:
David Foster: Off The Record-Netflix. Great profile on The grammy award winning composer and producer. You will be awed at how many famous people he has written or produced for! Streisand, Chicago, Stevie Wonder, Josh Groban, Michael Buble, Celine Dion, Andrea Bocelli and others.
Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich-on Netflix. Extremely difficult to watch. Survivors of his abuse explain how he used his wealth and power to carry out atrocities. Not sure I can finish. Creepy....
Dirty John/The Betty Broderick Story-on USA. This isn't a documentary but based on the true story of a breakdown of a marriage that ends in a double homicide. Amanda Peet knocks it out of the ball park as Betty Broderick. Christian Slater plays her husband.
Quiz-AMC. Three part drama about a real couple who were accused of cheating their way to a million pounds on a Quiz Show in Britain.
Laurel Canyon-on Epix. Two part series about the musicians who lived in Laurel Canyon during the 60's and 70's. One of the best shows I've watched in the pandemic. It's really FABULOUS!
Lenox Hill-on Netflix. Documentary series about four doctors at Lenox Hill Hospital in NYC. If you ever need a neurosurgeon, check out both Dr. David Langer and Dr. John Boockvar. They are incredibly brilliant and caring and phenomenal physicians. Super interesting!
Mrs. America-on FX. The story of Phyllis Schlafly, who led the conservative movement to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment. Great Cast with Cate Blanchett, Rose Byrne, Uzo Aduba, Sarah Paulson, and Tracey Ullman.
JUST FOR THE ENTERTAINMENT:
Hollywood-on Netflix. Created by Ryan Murphy. Series about post WW II Hollywood and its aspiring actors and filmmakers. Fair but entertaining.
Never Have I Ever-on Netflix. Created by Mindy Kaling. Plot is about the complicated life of a first generation Indian American teen who is a sophomore in High School. Cute. Better for teens.
Greenleaf-on Own. This is the fifth season and one of my favorites. The story is about the Greenleaf family who runs a Memphis megachurch and the scandalous secrets of this supposedly close knit family.
Intersection-on Netflix. Basically a Turkish soap opera about 2 wealthy businessmen and how their lives cross paths. Each episode is VERY long and there are two seasons. So, it is a big investment of time. Many have raved about this-I don't get why. That being said I watched the entire two seasons! I got hooked. Beware-if you start it, you will probably want to finish!
The Politician-on Netflix. This is the second season. I've lost interest. Great Cast-Ben Platt, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jessica Lange, Bette Midler, Judith Light, and many others. Started out as smart and addictive. Downhill in the second season.
RECCOMENDATIONS FROM FRIENDS (THAT I HAVE NOT YET WATCHED)
The Umbrella Factor-on Netflix.
White Lines-on Netflix
Money Heist-on Netflix.
Lovelife-on HBO Max.
Greyhound-Apple TV plus. Tom Hanks new movie.
Escape to the Chateau-PBS. If you like renovations and old houses, this docuseries is supposed to be great!
World on Fire-on PBS. WWII drama following the everyday lives of people in five countries
.
This should keep you busy for a while! Be well. Stay safe. Wear a mask!
PEACE OUT-ONE B
First I'll suggest some good shows for the KIDS:
Hamilton-on Disney Plus. My grandsons give it 2 thumbs up and will sing you the entire score!
The Baby Sitter's Club-on Netflix. I just watched the series so I could discuss it with my grandchildren, and thought it was terrific. Many lessons are taught and it's fun to watch.
The Secret Garden(2020)-on Netflix. Haven't watched. A child's parents suddenly dies and she moves to her Aunt and Uncle's home where a magical garden exists.
Recently watched MOVIES:
Da Five Bloods-on Netflix. Amazing performance by Delroy Lindo. About Vietnam and a heist.
The King of Staten Island-on Prime. Autobiography of Pete Davidson from Saturday Night Live. Comedy/drama. I liked this but recommend it for the 50 and under crowd and/or fans of SNL.
The Truth-on Netflix. Starring Catherine Deneuve, Juliette Binoche and Ethan Hawke. Mother daughter drama. Great cast. Deneuve is fabulous to watch.
Shirley-on Hulu. Elisabeth Moss stars as famed horror author Shirley Jackson. Moss is superb, but the movie is fair yet held my interest.
Hope Gap-on Amazon Prime. Intense story of Grace (Annette Bening) and her husband (Bill Nighy).
About a disintegrating marriage of 29 years. Excellent performances. Worth a watch.
Saving Face-on Amazon Prime. A story of a lesbian doctor navigating her love relationship and balancing her traditional mother and grandparent's views with her lifestyle. Thumbs up.
DOCUMENTARIES or SHOWS BASED ON A TRUE STORY:
David Foster: Off The Record-Netflix. Great profile on The grammy award winning composer and producer. You will be awed at how many famous people he has written or produced for! Streisand, Chicago, Stevie Wonder, Josh Groban, Michael Buble, Celine Dion, Andrea Bocelli and others.
Jeffrey Epstein: Filthy Rich-on Netflix. Extremely difficult to watch. Survivors of his abuse explain how he used his wealth and power to carry out atrocities. Not sure I can finish. Creepy....
Dirty John/The Betty Broderick Story-on USA. This isn't a documentary but based on the true story of a breakdown of a marriage that ends in a double homicide. Amanda Peet knocks it out of the ball park as Betty Broderick. Christian Slater plays her husband.
Quiz-AMC. Three part drama about a real couple who were accused of cheating their way to a million pounds on a Quiz Show in Britain.
Laurel Canyon-on Epix. Two part series about the musicians who lived in Laurel Canyon during the 60's and 70's. One of the best shows I've watched in the pandemic. It's really FABULOUS!
Lenox Hill-on Netflix. Documentary series about four doctors at Lenox Hill Hospital in NYC. If you ever need a neurosurgeon, check out both Dr. David Langer and Dr. John Boockvar. They are incredibly brilliant and caring and phenomenal physicians. Super interesting!
Mrs. America-on FX. The story of Phyllis Schlafly, who led the conservative movement to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment. Great Cast with Cate Blanchett, Rose Byrne, Uzo Aduba, Sarah Paulson, and Tracey Ullman.
JUST FOR THE ENTERTAINMENT:
Hollywood-on Netflix. Created by Ryan Murphy. Series about post WW II Hollywood and its aspiring actors and filmmakers. Fair but entertaining.
Never Have I Ever-on Netflix. Created by Mindy Kaling. Plot is about the complicated life of a first generation Indian American teen who is a sophomore in High School. Cute. Better for teens.
Greenleaf-on Own. This is the fifth season and one of my favorites. The story is about the Greenleaf family who runs a Memphis megachurch and the scandalous secrets of this supposedly close knit family.
Intersection-on Netflix. Basically a Turkish soap opera about 2 wealthy businessmen and how their lives cross paths. Each episode is VERY long and there are two seasons. So, it is a big investment of time. Many have raved about this-I don't get why. That being said I watched the entire two seasons! I got hooked. Beware-if you start it, you will probably want to finish!
The Politician-on Netflix. This is the second season. I've lost interest. Great Cast-Ben Platt, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jessica Lange, Bette Midler, Judith Light, and many others. Started out as smart and addictive. Downhill in the second season.
RECCOMENDATIONS FROM FRIENDS (THAT I HAVE NOT YET WATCHED)
The Umbrella Factor-on Netflix.
White Lines-on Netflix
Money Heist-on Netflix.
Lovelife-on HBO Max.
Greyhound-Apple TV plus. Tom Hanks new movie.
Escape to the Chateau-PBS. If you like renovations and old houses, this docuseries is supposed to be great!
World on Fire-on PBS. WWII drama following the everyday lives of people in five countries
.
This should keep you busy for a while! Be well. Stay safe. Wear a mask!
PEACE OUT-ONE B
Tuesday, June 30, 2020
STRENGTH WHISPERS. WEAKNESS SCREAMS (or tweets)
As the U.S. grapples with a major spike in corona cases in the South and the West, the European Union has banned Americans from traveling to Europe. This not only severely impacts the world's health but also the economy for Europe and America. We need a National Approach to this pandemic and fast. Even as cases surge in California, Texas and Florida, the administration has scaled back funding for federal testing and closed 13 testing sites. There are still not enough tests, not enough ICU beds, not enough PPE. How can that be after watching what has occurred in NY, NJ, and Conn.? We are the only country that is not capable of flattening the curve. We have failed. What does it mean that we cannot engage in self sacrifice to keep our people safe? Are we that selfish?
Trump is not exhibiting any acceptance that we are now the leading country with the most cases of Coronavirus in the world. The United States should DO better; we should BE better. This is all about public cooperation-everyone must comply. We must all wear masks when going out anywhere. We must practice social distancing all the time, not some of the time. Social Distancing is still not being taken seriously. We need to respectfully distance at outside social gatherings, and not make others feel uncomfortable by approaching them. We must wipe down surfaces and wash hands frequently. We can not let our guard down. This is far from over. So you think it's not happening to the elderly anymore because 17-35 year olds are the new target? Well, guess what? The 17-35 year olds visit their parents, grandparents, professors, and restaurants where they spread the disease unknowingly.
Governor Phil Murphy has decided to not resume indoor dining. Understandably, the restaurant owners are angry and upset by this decision. But, the fact is that when dining indoors, your risk of getting the virus is 20 times higher. He did the right thing, He is saving lives.
I recently had a lovely short respite from our everyday life. We went up to the Vineyard. Every single person I saw wore a mask. If you happened to leave your home and forgot to wear your mask, you were the pariah. Whether they were outside, walking alone, or entering a store (where you must sanitize before entering and they limit the quantity of people to 4 at a time) a mask was ALWAYS on. All outdoor restaurants had curbside pickup and if there were tables, they were spaced well over 6 feet away. They have it right. They respect each other and are keeping themselves and others safe.
We aren't capable of stopping our everyday lives. It is not a realistic expectation. There is work, camp, school, errands, sports, recreation, etc. We need to have positive leadership with role models in our government who will wear masks, not hold indoor rallies, or attend indoor choir performances. We must promote the same rules for each and every person and from state to state. We need to get back to some normalcy. Look at England, Italy, Spain....they have figured it out. They flattened the curve.
So what next? My grandchildren have started camp and are interacting with many kids. My children have dinner with friends outdoors. My club has outside dining. Swimming pools and beaches are open. My hair and nail salon have opened. Do I sit next to the kids? Do I get hair color or a blow out at a salon? How often should I go to the grocery store? Do I venture up to the club for a meal? Is it ok to go to the dentist or podiatrist? Truthfully, I am petrified. I want to do all of this, but I am very wary, because I am old. Because I have an elderly mom. Because I want to keep my husband, children, grandchildren and friends safe. I often say that your Coronavirus rules are similar to how people observe their religion. You must do what you feel comfortable with. Some people don't bring in takeout food, but they will go to the grocery store. Some people chat on the first tee and they are not socially distant or wearing a mask because they are "outside". Some people have friends over for dinner and sit at the same table and share communal snacks. Some people have their hair done in the garage but let their grandchildren sleep over. I do not judge what you want to do. But I insist that we all respect each other's individual preferences. You do You, but please respect Me. Respect is a choice. I pray we all make wise choices, and we keep well and safe.
Ooh child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh child
Things'll get brighter
Some day. yeah
We'll put it together and we'll get it undone
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter
PEACE OUT-ONE B
Trump is not exhibiting any acceptance that we are now the leading country with the most cases of Coronavirus in the world. The United States should DO better; we should BE better. This is all about public cooperation-everyone must comply. We must all wear masks when going out anywhere. We must practice social distancing all the time, not some of the time. Social Distancing is still not being taken seriously. We need to respectfully distance at outside social gatherings, and not make others feel uncomfortable by approaching them. We must wipe down surfaces and wash hands frequently. We can not let our guard down. This is far from over. So you think it's not happening to the elderly anymore because 17-35 year olds are the new target? Well, guess what? The 17-35 year olds visit their parents, grandparents, professors, and restaurants where they spread the disease unknowingly.
Governor Phil Murphy has decided to not resume indoor dining. Understandably, the restaurant owners are angry and upset by this decision. But, the fact is that when dining indoors, your risk of getting the virus is 20 times higher. He did the right thing, He is saving lives.
I recently had a lovely short respite from our everyday life. We went up to the Vineyard. Every single person I saw wore a mask. If you happened to leave your home and forgot to wear your mask, you were the pariah. Whether they were outside, walking alone, or entering a store (where you must sanitize before entering and they limit the quantity of people to 4 at a time) a mask was ALWAYS on. All outdoor restaurants had curbside pickup and if there were tables, they were spaced well over 6 feet away. They have it right. They respect each other and are keeping themselves and others safe.
We aren't capable of stopping our everyday lives. It is not a realistic expectation. There is work, camp, school, errands, sports, recreation, etc. We need to have positive leadership with role models in our government who will wear masks, not hold indoor rallies, or attend indoor choir performances. We must promote the same rules for each and every person and from state to state. We need to get back to some normalcy. Look at England, Italy, Spain....they have figured it out. They flattened the curve.
So what next? My grandchildren have started camp and are interacting with many kids. My children have dinner with friends outdoors. My club has outside dining. Swimming pools and beaches are open. My hair and nail salon have opened. Do I sit next to the kids? Do I get hair color or a blow out at a salon? How often should I go to the grocery store? Do I venture up to the club for a meal? Is it ok to go to the dentist or podiatrist? Truthfully, I am petrified. I want to do all of this, but I am very wary, because I am old. Because I have an elderly mom. Because I want to keep my husband, children, grandchildren and friends safe. I often say that your Coronavirus rules are similar to how people observe their religion. You must do what you feel comfortable with. Some people don't bring in takeout food, but they will go to the grocery store. Some people chat on the first tee and they are not socially distant or wearing a mask because they are "outside". Some people have friends over for dinner and sit at the same table and share communal snacks. Some people have their hair done in the garage but let their grandchildren sleep over. I do not judge what you want to do. But I insist that we all respect each other's individual preferences. You do You, but please respect Me. Respect is a choice. I pray we all make wise choices, and we keep well and safe.
Ooh child
Things are gonna get easier
Ooh child
Things'll get brighter
Some day. yeah
We'll put it together and we'll get it undone
Some day
When your head is much lighter
Some day, yeah
We'll walk in the rays of a beautiful sun
Some day
When the world is much brighter
PEACE OUT-ONE B
Wednesday, May 27, 2020
Endless Lockdown Is Not How I Expected To Live Out My Golden Years
I am not going to lie. I am depressed. I am totally at my wit's end and yet, this virus's end is nowhere in sight. Before the pandemic, I was often with my grandchildren during the week. I either did school pickups; or drove one of them to an afternoon activity; or had a magnatile playdate building zoos, castles, and buildings; or went to parks; and we shared many fun experiences and meals together.
I went to the gym everyday. I would visit with my mom several times a week and I took her various places. I met my friends for dinner and drinks at a restaurant. Usually, my husband and I wouldn't eat dinner until 8pm (which is when he would get home from work). We traveled a few times a year and spent a week in the summer at Spring Lake with our kids and their kids. We were planning a Europe trip in the fall.
All of this has come to an alarming halt. My grandchildren can't come in my car. We can't go to movies together or touch their toys. Parks are out of the question-no swings or slides allowed. My mom has been in isolation for three months (and tomorrow I get to visit with her with a piece of plexiglass in between us)! There will be no travel and there is no Spring Lake this summer. And let's discuss my dinner-it's now at 6:30 p.m. because my husband is already home and done with work after a 12-13 hour day! So by 8:30, I am starving again. And, as I have told anyone who will listen: CHICOS is my new CHANEL!
I feel such sadness that I can't spend the same amount of time with the three youngest grandchildren (ages 1, almost 2, almost 3) as I had the opportunity to do with the two older boys. Do the little ones EVEN know me? When I do have the opportunity to see them, they can't figure out the masks or why I won't hug them. It has been sheer torture. The two older ones (ages 5 & 7) are much more understanding, and we talk a lot on Facetime and on Caribu. I miss getting and giving the hugs and kisses. Will they ever want to sleep here again? None of them have had the opportunity in so long or EVER, and I fear that they will be scared to sleep in a strange bed or crib.
So I have resorted to being a homework advisor and a shopper/chef for themed meals: S'More Saturday, Sundaes on Sunday, Mac and Cheese Monday, Taco Tuesday, Froot Loop Friday or Fish and Chips Friday, and Thinny Thin Pizza on Thursday (hasn't happened yet). Mind you-I don't eat the meals with them. We would be at two separate tables 12 feet away.
I do get to visit in a socially distant way with three of my grandsons. We can take a walk on opposite sides of the street or I can watch but NOT participate in any sports they play-no touching balls, paddles, swings. My other daughter will not allow any socially distant visits because her daughter and son are too young to understand staying away from us. It's completely heartbreaking. So for now, Facetime is my savior.
I know, I know-many of you are in exactly the same position or don't even have kids that live nearby. So I am grateful for the ability to be in close proximity to everyone, and very thankful that everyone is healthy!
That brings me to the lessons I can learn from this Hell. If you have to go through Hell, don't come out of it empty handed. So here it goes....
More often I take stock of the beauty around me-my lovely daughters and sons in law, my husband, my grandchildren, and nature that surrounds me everyday. I value the sunrises more, the sunsets, the birds chirping, foxes that cross my path while walking, and the blooming trees, flowers, and shrubs. ACHOO!!!!!!!! I don't take any of this for granted.
So much of what we used to do was and is unnecessary. We don't need to spend so much time shopping, buying things, driving places, or dressing in uncomfortable clothes and shoes.
All of us are stressed-try and be more gracious with the people you love. Have a greater degree of empathy for one another. They are all just as stressed as you are. This is not an easy time for anyone.
Show appreciation to all the wonderful service people out there-not just during the pandemic but always! The doctors, nurses, mailmen, food and package delivery people, plumbers, grill fixers, electricians, the a/c guy, the gardeners, the garbage men, grocery store workers, the chefs, all the amazing staff in assisted living and nursing facilities, news casters, governors, and everyone who continues to work so hard to help us get through this trying time. Never miss an opportunity to thank them! Tell them how much you appreciate them. All of them are HEROES.
This virus is Not going away. And there is NOT a vaccine that will be happening for a long while. So, I want to remind everyone that even as restrictions are lifted, the health experts still recommend that older adults (that's me!) avoid potential carriers. The safest strategy is to spend your social time outdoors. Stay 10-12 feet apart (not 6 feet) when inside or outside with others. Everyone over the age of 2 should be wearing a mask-I know that might be unrealistic. Don't share food or drinks. Always carry hand sanitizer. Explain to the younger children that masks are keeping their grandparents safe.
Stay connected with your relatives and friends. It is imperative for our emotional, mental, and physical health to interact with people. Loneliness is the great predictor of decline. So, Count your blessings and cherish what you have. And always remember that "Everyday is a gift; but tomorrow is never a promise."
I went to the gym everyday. I would visit with my mom several times a week and I took her various places. I met my friends for dinner and drinks at a restaurant. Usually, my husband and I wouldn't eat dinner until 8pm (which is when he would get home from work). We traveled a few times a year and spent a week in the summer at Spring Lake with our kids and their kids. We were planning a Europe trip in the fall.
All of this has come to an alarming halt. My grandchildren can't come in my car. We can't go to movies together or touch their toys. Parks are out of the question-no swings or slides allowed. My mom has been in isolation for three months (and tomorrow I get to visit with her with a piece of plexiglass in between us)! There will be no travel and there is no Spring Lake this summer. And let's discuss my dinner-it's now at 6:30 p.m. because my husband is already home and done with work after a 12-13 hour day! So by 8:30, I am starving again. And, as I have told anyone who will listen: CHICOS is my new CHANEL!
I feel such sadness that I can't spend the same amount of time with the three youngest grandchildren (ages 1, almost 2, almost 3) as I had the opportunity to do with the two older boys. Do the little ones EVEN know me? When I do have the opportunity to see them, they can't figure out the masks or why I won't hug them. It has been sheer torture. The two older ones (ages 5 & 7) are much more understanding, and we talk a lot on Facetime and on Caribu. I miss getting and giving the hugs and kisses. Will they ever want to sleep here again? None of them have had the opportunity in so long or EVER, and I fear that they will be scared to sleep in a strange bed or crib.
So I have resorted to being a homework advisor and a shopper/chef for themed meals: S'More Saturday, Sundaes on Sunday, Mac and Cheese Monday, Taco Tuesday, Froot Loop Friday or Fish and Chips Friday, and Thinny Thin Pizza on Thursday (hasn't happened yet). Mind you-I don't eat the meals with them. We would be at two separate tables 12 feet away.
I do get to visit in a socially distant way with three of my grandsons. We can take a walk on opposite sides of the street or I can watch but NOT participate in any sports they play-no touching balls, paddles, swings. My other daughter will not allow any socially distant visits because her daughter and son are too young to understand staying away from us. It's completely heartbreaking. So for now, Facetime is my savior.
I know, I know-many of you are in exactly the same position or don't even have kids that live nearby. So I am grateful for the ability to be in close proximity to everyone, and very thankful that everyone is healthy!
That brings me to the lessons I can learn from this Hell. If you have to go through Hell, don't come out of it empty handed. So here it goes....
More often I take stock of the beauty around me-my lovely daughters and sons in law, my husband, my grandchildren, and nature that surrounds me everyday. I value the sunrises more, the sunsets, the birds chirping, foxes that cross my path while walking, and the blooming trees, flowers, and shrubs. ACHOO!!!!!!!! I don't take any of this for granted.
So much of what we used to do was and is unnecessary. We don't need to spend so much time shopping, buying things, driving places, or dressing in uncomfortable clothes and shoes.
All of us are stressed-try and be more gracious with the people you love. Have a greater degree of empathy for one another. They are all just as stressed as you are. This is not an easy time for anyone.
Show appreciation to all the wonderful service people out there-not just during the pandemic but always! The doctors, nurses, mailmen, food and package delivery people, plumbers, grill fixers, electricians, the a/c guy, the gardeners, the garbage men, grocery store workers, the chefs, all the amazing staff in assisted living and nursing facilities, news casters, governors, and everyone who continues to work so hard to help us get through this trying time. Never miss an opportunity to thank them! Tell them how much you appreciate them. All of them are HEROES.
This virus is Not going away. And there is NOT a vaccine that will be happening for a long while. So, I want to remind everyone that even as restrictions are lifted, the health experts still recommend that older adults (that's me!) avoid potential carriers. The safest strategy is to spend your social time outdoors. Stay 10-12 feet apart (not 6 feet) when inside or outside with others. Everyone over the age of 2 should be wearing a mask-I know that might be unrealistic. Don't share food or drinks. Always carry hand sanitizer. Explain to the younger children that masks are keeping their grandparents safe.
Stay connected with your relatives and friends. It is imperative for our emotional, mental, and physical health to interact with people. Loneliness is the great predictor of decline. So, Count your blessings and cherish what you have. And always remember that "Everyday is a gift; but tomorrow is never a promise."
Wednesday, May 6, 2020
NEW ONE B BLOG: "TIME IS THE FINAL CURRENCY" (David Crosby)
Here I am again with more rants!
Donald Trump is a man who deflects blame both personally and politically. Everyday he selects someone else to attack. Who is it now? Obama, China, WHO, the FBI, the press, President Bush, The Lincoln Project?
Trump fired Dr. Rick Bright, a former vaccine official. Why? Bright filed a whistleblower complaint against the Whitehouse stating he was pressured to ignore scientific recommendations and put politics and cronyism ahead of human lives. Where is the ethics in this firing? Trump continually berates and pushes out the brightest people. DON'T CROSS THE BOSS is his motto. He doesn't want truth.
If your child, spouse, friend, or partner was acting this erratically, you would seek help immediately.
Does Trump think if we don't talk about the virus it will just vanish? When an epidemic strikes, we need communication from scientists and medical experts. It is vital we have clear facts and clear evidence. If Trump engaged the scientists to provide our information and allowed them to actually tell us the facts, he would then be a true leader.
We are in a crisis. A crisis is an opportunity to show how you lead. A leader would demonstrate competence, firmness, and honesty. Closing your eyes to the recent models of how the virus will progress, and refusing to provide adequate testing for our country merely proves his choice to put politics and economics above the value of human lives.
Angus King, the Independent senator from Maine, is on the Intelligence Committee and was put on the Task Force to reopen the country. He was contacted only once (to be assigned to the Task Force). Several Weeks ago, he wrote to Trump suggesting that he place the competent Joe Dunford (19th former Chief of Staff) in charge of testing so that by June 15, the U.S. could be testing 2 million people a day. The suggestion fell on deaf ears. This morning, Dr. Jonathan Reiner said that a new study indicates every person in America should be tested. The reason for this comment: Asymptomatic people are shedding the virus and exhibit absolutely no symptoms. So, when you are in the market or at the pharmacy, there are many people in the aisles unknowingly spreading this virus. Extensive testing is the ONLY way we can eradicate this virus until there is a vaccine. Trump does not care about saving lives. He cares about winning the November election, and the stock market. And,"the real tragedy is that this is a mistake. By cutting himself off from people who know their subject matter and who will tell him the truth, he is cutting himself off from good information, which makes for very bad decisions." This virus is about science. No politics or ideology is involved.
Is it necessary to open tattoo parlors, nail salons, and bowling alleys? Who is that helping?
FDR said in his 1937 Inaugural Speech: "Hard-headness will not so easily excuse Hard-heartedness."
So, on a completely different tangent....How are all of you dealing with your significant others in such close quarters 24/7? I assume for some of you it's fabulous, and for some of you, not so much. I read an interesting interview in The New Yorker with therapist, Esther Perel. She discusses what happens to couples under stress.
Presently, in this isolation era your "partner is now expected to be your best friend, lover, psychotherapist, childcare co-worker, dishwasher, cook, housekeeper. Before all this, historically some of these positions were spread out within the community".
She suggests that we "create boundaries and routines". We should "separate day and night, weekdays and weekends, private time and family time. Couples need to regulate togetherness and separateness with or without confinement during a corona virus."
I couldn't agree with this more! I have always been a loner during the day! I need my space and my autonomy. I don't like to talk in the morning. I value my alone time. I don't want to discuss who I spoke with on the phone, or what my best friend had to say. I don't want to have lunch together on a weekday. In fact, I don't want to eat lunch at all on a weekday! Believe me, I adore my husband. And I am truly a very social person-I love talking to and being with my friends, I love going out and having fun. But, I am also equally happy spending time with just me, myself, and I. So, just let me be until we meet up at our dinners each evening, or until the weekend. I'll even eat lunch with you on Saturday and Sunday! Partners shouldn't take this personally or be offended. For me, it is merely about maintaining the routines we had before this virus came along. I am the same person I always was-my alone time is necessary for my sanity!
Ok-what to watch next?
Hollywood-Netflix
I Know This Much is True-HBO on 5/10
Jerry Seinfeld's 23 Hours to Kill - Netflix
Big Time Adolescence-Hulu
Quotes I like:
"Never underestimate what a hungry man will do for bacon." From the show, WACO.
"Shingles, Whiskers, bad bones, and bunions" -referring to what happens to women as they age.
From the show Better Things.
Can't wait until I can rant with all of you in person! Be well. Stay Safe.
PEACE OUT-ONE B
Donald Trump is a man who deflects blame both personally and politically. Everyday he selects someone else to attack. Who is it now? Obama, China, WHO, the FBI, the press, President Bush, The Lincoln Project?
Trump fired Dr. Rick Bright, a former vaccine official. Why? Bright filed a whistleblower complaint against the Whitehouse stating he was pressured to ignore scientific recommendations and put politics and cronyism ahead of human lives. Where is the ethics in this firing? Trump continually berates and pushes out the brightest people. DON'T CROSS THE BOSS is his motto. He doesn't want truth.
If your child, spouse, friend, or partner was acting this erratically, you would seek help immediately.
Does Trump think if we don't talk about the virus it will just vanish? When an epidemic strikes, we need communication from scientists and medical experts. It is vital we have clear facts and clear evidence. If Trump engaged the scientists to provide our information and allowed them to actually tell us the facts, he would then be a true leader.
We are in a crisis. A crisis is an opportunity to show how you lead. A leader would demonstrate competence, firmness, and honesty. Closing your eyes to the recent models of how the virus will progress, and refusing to provide adequate testing for our country merely proves his choice to put politics and economics above the value of human lives.
Angus King, the Independent senator from Maine, is on the Intelligence Committee and was put on the Task Force to reopen the country. He was contacted only once (to be assigned to the Task Force). Several Weeks ago, he wrote to Trump suggesting that he place the competent Joe Dunford (19th former Chief of Staff) in charge of testing so that by June 15, the U.S. could be testing 2 million people a day. The suggestion fell on deaf ears. This morning, Dr. Jonathan Reiner said that a new study indicates every person in America should be tested. The reason for this comment: Asymptomatic people are shedding the virus and exhibit absolutely no symptoms. So, when you are in the market or at the pharmacy, there are many people in the aisles unknowingly spreading this virus. Extensive testing is the ONLY way we can eradicate this virus until there is a vaccine. Trump does not care about saving lives. He cares about winning the November election, and the stock market. And,"the real tragedy is that this is a mistake. By cutting himself off from people who know their subject matter and who will tell him the truth, he is cutting himself off from good information, which makes for very bad decisions." This virus is about science. No politics or ideology is involved.
Is it necessary to open tattoo parlors, nail salons, and bowling alleys? Who is that helping?
FDR said in his 1937 Inaugural Speech: "Hard-headness will not so easily excuse Hard-heartedness."
So, on a completely different tangent....How are all of you dealing with your significant others in such close quarters 24/7? I assume for some of you it's fabulous, and for some of you, not so much. I read an interesting interview in The New Yorker with therapist, Esther Perel. She discusses what happens to couples under stress.
Presently, in this isolation era your "partner is now expected to be your best friend, lover, psychotherapist, childcare co-worker, dishwasher, cook, housekeeper. Before all this, historically some of these positions were spread out within the community".
She suggests that we "create boundaries and routines". We should "separate day and night, weekdays and weekends, private time and family time. Couples need to regulate togetherness and separateness with or without confinement during a corona virus."
I couldn't agree with this more! I have always been a loner during the day! I need my space and my autonomy. I don't like to talk in the morning. I value my alone time. I don't want to discuss who I spoke with on the phone, or what my best friend had to say. I don't want to have lunch together on a weekday. In fact, I don't want to eat lunch at all on a weekday! Believe me, I adore my husband. And I am truly a very social person-I love talking to and being with my friends, I love going out and having fun. But, I am also equally happy spending time with just me, myself, and I. So, just let me be until we meet up at our dinners each evening, or until the weekend. I'll even eat lunch with you on Saturday and Sunday! Partners shouldn't take this personally or be offended. For me, it is merely about maintaining the routines we had before this virus came along. I am the same person I always was-my alone time is necessary for my sanity!
Ok-what to watch next?
Hollywood-Netflix
I Know This Much is True-HBO on 5/10
Jerry Seinfeld's 23 Hours to Kill - Netflix
Big Time Adolescence-Hulu
Quotes I like:
"Never underestimate what a hungry man will do for bacon." From the show, WACO.
"Shingles, Whiskers, bad bones, and bunions" -referring to what happens to women as they age.
From the show Better Things.
Can't wait until I can rant with all of you in person! Be well. Stay Safe.
PEACE OUT-ONE B
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